Conversations with myself: Supermom?! I think not.

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Good morning, it’s 5:30am, and the first baby is awake, she is crying, “Ok, ok I am up” and remind myself; “milk goes in the cup; it’s time to stop the bottle.”
I change diapers then we go down for milk and I pour some in the cup, “I hope the second baby sleeps longer than her sister” I think to myself. Oh oh second baby is up; “hurry hurry.” I mumble to myself.

“We will just do cups tomorrow,” “come on Boomie just give her the cup if she’s hungry she won’t care.” But I’m in a hurry; I have to get to the other baby who is now screaming. Dad is shoveling snow outside, we had 10 inches overnight.
Supermom just lost a battle even before it started; gave them their milk in bottles. “Shame on me” I think, or not. I am feeling bad; the day has just started and I’m already giving in.

8:00am- milk in cup yes!!! Oh no, the second baby won’t take it, “you are going to be hungry;” I tell her, “please God let her drink it.” I prayed silently. She doesn’t, “no milk for you then” I feel bad but I’m trying to be tough.
We finally settle downstairs; “you are having applesauce for your noon time snack; first baby up do you hear that?” I said unconvincingly.

Noontime- she is screaming and my head hurts; oh I forgot to tell you; “I’ve got really bad sinus infection and I’m taking Zyretec and Antibiotics,” I’m drowsy but keep moving.
“Ok, you will be hungry” I tell her, as I pull out what I know she wants: yogurt. “You are only getting one today, I hope you know that, look at your sister eating her applesauce;” I continued I’m feeding both of them at the same time. She is still crying; I’m trying to feed as fast as I can.

“Oh I have to use my vitamins; drink or eat something,” I remembered, just as I felt a pang in my stomach-HUNGER! There goes my workout again, “I haven’t been to the gym in over a week; and I need to lose weight; I need to find a career, find something to do,” my head is spinning with so many thoughts. Crying!!! Back to reality; first baby wants another cup of yogurt and so does her sister. “These things cost money girls,” I said as I opened another cup; “that’s the last one and no yogurt tomorrow” I tell them.

Dinner- eat; or not. I’m so tired I can’t think straight, the news is on and guess what it’s Christmas on Saturday, WHAT!!! No pictures with Santa, they don’t have any dresses, shoes, or presents. Christmas around the corner means dad’s birthday is next week, he is going to be 21 for 15th or 16th time, I don’t even know anymore. Oh no I need more time, I will have to be out early tomorrow. “Hmmm there goes my workout again, maybe day after,” I’m trying to convince myself. “Ouch I need to clean the house, I wonder where I can find an affordable cleaner;” I think to myself. You know, I will just take this week off from working out. Well I have taken the last few weeks off L I look at my tummy. “God please make me skinny!!!” I begged looking up.

Bath time, bed- The girls are tucked in. Me- time finally! “Should I take a shower?” I asked myself, but the medications are in full mood, and I’m drowsy; well, there’s my answer. Tomorrow morning then, I’m going out anyways.

Peace and quiet, I’m reflecting on the day, I got one baby to drink milk from her cup, I took out their hair, what else; I didn’t work out, couldn’t go out, I still haven’t had a bath; “focus Boomie, remember peace and quiet;” I muttered half asleep. I hear crying, “Come on I just went to bed five minutes ago,” I screamed in my head. I check my cell phone, its 11:30pm, and I have 12 missed calls; “whatever” I thought as I asked myself “who is crying?!” Oh goodness it’s the TV, thank God, “did I pray before going to bed, pray now, then read my bible, I will just read psalm 23; it’s shorter plus I know it by heart so I’m not really reading;” God please help me, zzzzzzzz. “Wake up Boomie”, “no you wake up,” I replied to my alarm clock. What?!? Its 5:30am, and the first baby is up….cup or bottle?!? Here we go, it’s almost Christmas.

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8 responses »

  1. This made me laugh out loud in so many places…..the visuals you created…..especially when you murmmured to yourself,the image at the end of the day as you skim over Psalm 23….LOOOOL!!!and by the time you shut your eyes….it’s time to get up again!!!Spot on!!

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