Happy Birthday To Me: Dear Self, This One is For You!

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Me and my Chocolate and Hazelnut Cake with Caramel ButterCream

It’s my birthday, Yay! I love birthdays, especially mine :). I get a day that’s truly mine to celebrate myself. (I’m so vain). I eat, drink, party, and just have a great time. I never miss an opportunity to enjoy myself on my birthday.
This year as my birthday approaches, my state of mind is somewhat different, still celebratory no doubt but also deep in thoughts. Every year, I grow older but am I any wiser? Do I grow in other ways that matter? Or am I stuck in the phase of average, and ordinary?

It’s so easy to lose focus, and pursue the not so significant especially when there seems to be so much clamoring for my attention. So this year, while still celebrating I am going to take some time to search inward, truly search and find ways that I can grow myself.

1. No more excuses: yes, I am a queen in that area. They just seem so convenient, and easier to handle. Unfortunately they don’t get me anywhere, instead I’m left stagnant and really on the decline. I have found that my excuses are just a way to hide the fact that I am being lazy.

2. Let go: I am terribly timid, insecure, shy, scared, and all those things that seem charming but are really not. I set up inhibitions for myself in my own head just as an idea pops up. Rather than thinking of ways to execute the ideas, I kill them even before they get a chance.

3. Failure: nobody wants to fail. But if I don’t try, how would I know, and if I don’t fail, how can I learn to do it better. I need to understand that failure is not the enemy, but staying in that state is the real default.

4. Get over myself: I am so self-conscious, it’s become terrible. I get so ill at ease quickly. I hate attention, and so the moment anyone notices me, the insecurities take over. I need to get over myself because I am sure everyone else has.

5. Seek out myself: I don’t know myself, or maybe I do and I’m unsure. I need to seek out my own personal truths, know, and own them. No more living through other people’s perceptions or point of view. No more presenting myself as something different to different people, and trying to please everyone. Recognize my strengths, believe, and own them.

6. Love myself wholly: the good, bad, and ugly. Every part of me must be loved and appreciated before others can. Besides, how can I obey the great commission of loving my neighbors as myself, if I don’t love myself? I will take good care of my body, my mind, my spirit, and soul. I will nurture my well being. Live better, think wiser, and do better.

7. Worry less: stop over thinking everything, stop analyzing every detail. Stop obsessing over issues, what people think or say about me. I don’t always have to be in control. The One who created the world has got it all covered.

8. Believe in me: nobody else will if I don’t. Put an end to the constant need for validation from others. Stop trying to fit into every crowd I find myself in. Understand that its ok to be different.

9. Embrace my life: so many things I wish my life was, but it’s not. I must learn to embrace and be thankful for the life that I have.

10. Gratitude: learn to be thankful for my blessings and misfortunes, for they all work together for a far greater good.

These are the areas I need to grow this year, Lord willing next year I won’t just be a year older, but also wiser. I am going to hold myself accountable for my own growth.

So this birthday, while I am happy I am a year older, I am also happy that I am finally growing up. Happy birthday to me, Yay!

And if you are wondering how old I am, I will tell you. I am old enough :)!

If this note mirrors your life in anyway, feel free to join me on this journey towards personal growth, and maturity.

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19 responses »

  1. I like 5 and 6… I’ll be joining you in the journey towards personal growth, and maturity. Happy birthday again my dear friend.

  2. Soul searching….I love it! I have done my own soul searching…it’s tough but you realize that it was all worth it! Let your hair down, be you while running the race set before you! It’s liberating.
    Mhmmm “Put an end to the constant need for validation”….wow, now that is the real struggle but the truth is hard to take in; “Not everyone wld love me?”, and that is so fine bcos i learnt that God loving me is the most important thing and that definitely sets one free.
    Thanks Boomie Bol…very liberating i must say!
    Happy birthday my dear friend and here’s is one calling for you so let that voice be heard and be read! lol…..Love you always

  3. Regardless of us being cousins, I’m just glad that I know you as a person because you are really cool! Happy Birthday to My Cousin and Friend!

  4. Why didn’t I know you had a blog? Most importantly that you had all those cakes for your birthday…
    Soul searching… it’s a beautiful thing… I was read a book “worn out woman” and these lines gets me every time
    “Make no mistake soul searching is not optional. It’s not a luxury, but a necessity.”
    My dear my prayer for you; Faith in dreams and the courage to pursue it.

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