Walking With Happiness- Poetry Prompt By Recton Poet

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I was reading some blogs earlier in the day, and came across this prompt by Nicholas Gagnier of http://retconpoet.wordpress.com. I started working on it immediately, I usually don’t like to do challenges, no special reasons, my nerves just always get the best of me, but since I am looking to push myself in many ways; I decided to do this.

You can find the video and link- here. This is what I came up with, feel free to join if interested; see his blog above for more information. As always, please feel free to critique and analyze :). Thank you!!!

I walked on sunshine
In ‘95 when I was with him
It was great
But that was it

In the new millennium
I walked on water
I found faith
And embraced a new religion
But that was it

Now as I sit back
Watching the sun set
Over the glistening waters
Of Lake Michigan and
I can’t help but smile

I have had love
And faith
I now have life….

I picked a pebble
Tossed it up then down
I smiled again
My heart full
Glad and
Content

Content
Knowing I had found myself
I had embraced my truth

No longer scared
I now walk with myself
Walking with happiness

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26 responses »

  1. I like this. You’ve covered a heck of a lot of emotional ground and growth here. It’s VERY well-written, Boomie. And thoughtful. Addresses a universal journey. Just really good.
    Take out “now” in next to last line or rearrange it. Sounds awkward.
    “I walked” in first line. (past perfect doesn’t make sense here)
    I may be wrong, but sounds good to me! 🙂
    Carry on, Boomie Girl. You’re good.

    • Thank you very much George, I really appreciate this…I will look at the poem again and make changes where necessary. I honestly wrote it in about 2 minutes and posted it later in the day hence the need to have it scrutinized and looked over. Thanks for doing that. Have a great sunday

      • “Toss down a stone” is perhaps the best line in this poem. On a subliminal level, this is creating an image like no other. We are comfortable with “throwing, skipping, dropping, tossing a stone”, but throwing down a stone is a powerful description. It carries the tone of finality and fleshes out the message of the poem, and it sticks in the head. You are good, Boomie. Really good.

    • Thanks so much, glad you enjoyed it…i was thinking pebbles as in stones…those ones you find on the beach lol. That’s what they are called right? I appreciate this comment. Have a lovely sunday

  2. ok now you have had critique by others and it is constructive, I will just say this is one of your best and I love it.
    Appreciate the crit and learn by it I would love to have that feedback so that I might grow as well. ((hugs))

    • Thank you so much Len, I really appreciate this and every other comment. This was an impromptu poem and so i really needed constructive feedback :). Have a great sunday and loads of hugs to ya.

  3. Beautiful words spoken from your heart. Either one can relate to the vision of your heart or not. Change only for God because He is not interested in the grammar of our writings but the grammar of our hearts ♥ When people tune their true heart and just look at the beauty. I get it-you tossed the pebble up then back down to it’s original place and your mind and heart was full of finding your true self. So it made you smiled. You walk in just being you, not in someone else’s skin.

    I emailed you. Check your email.
    Blessings to you and allow your words to speak from the heart of God. God is using you to touch those who so need it. Amen.

    A Woman After God’s Own Heart ♥

  4. I like “it was great…but that was it,” implying that it’s isolated from you somewhat. At the end when you walk with yourself, you walk with happiness — you have a great experience that comes from within.

  5. Pingback: Poetry Prompt: Around the Bend « littlebitsofmysoul

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